Andy in Tokyo News, views, life and current affairs from Japan

Everyone in Japan was eating yakiniku this weekend, or so it seemed, thanks to an all-you-can-eat for ¥1500 (that’s 7.50 British scrotes) promotion from one of the largest yakiniku restaurant chains in the country. The queue for our local branch tonight stretched all the way down three flights of stairs, along a hallway and into the street outside. If there’s one thing the Japanese like more than food, it’s waiting a space-age in queues outside restaurants. We just put our name down on the waiting list and came back an hour later, so God knows why they were waiting.

Upon entering the restaurant the first thing we could see was, well, nothing much at all. The place was filled with so much smoke from the countless mini BBQ’s that the staff had to use bat-like sonar senses to navigate between tables. We were shown to our seats and ordered our first three plates, which came in lightning fast speed considering how busy the place was. There were two guys sat on the table next to us who had clearly starved themselves all weekend in preparation for yakiniku heaven - empty plates were stacked high and their BBQ looked like a raging inferno thanks to all the fat dripping off the meat as it cooked and onto the charcoal below - we began in earnest, and the first few plates were devoured without trouble. But…

Rather than pace ourselves, we decided to go all out before our 90 minute time-limit was up. The plates of meat continued to arrive, we continued to throw them on the BBQ with enthusiasm. I could feel my heart begging for respite from this cholesterol overload, but no, no, no stopping, I was Rocky Balboa and this meal was my Apollo Creed.

At 8.30pm our time was up. The guys seated next to us had left moments earlier, after consuming a whopping fourteen plates of meat, plus salad AND dessert. By comparison, we managed a paltry seven plates before deciding that any more would almost certainly result in us needing a coronary bypass before the day was out.

Tonight’s little feast may have shortened my life by five years, but by ‘eck, it were worth it.

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