Supermarket Espionage #1
Staring into other people’s shopping baskets while queuing at the supermarket checkout. Everyone does it, in fact it’s almost impossible not to have a sneaky peak. I mean, what else is there to do? Read the ingredients label on your Sharwood’s Tikka Curry sauce jar?
You can learn a lot about someone from the contents of their shopping basket, at least on a somewhat primitive level - e.g. three big boxes of Frosties = a house-full of ADD sprogs - but there are times when absolutely no concrete information can be gleaned. It’s at this point imagination is called upon to step in and fill the breach.
Let us begin…
Supermarket Espionage #1
- Subject: Female, approx. 55 years old, wearing oversize pea-green overcoat. Looked a bit like “Postman Pat”.
- Basket Contents: 5 grapefruit, 4 small cartons of fresh cream.
- Conclusion: Born into a rich merchant family in Yokohama, at age seven she turned to a life of crime, robbing labradors of their pocket money in order to feed a highly destructive Sherbet Dip addiction. Disowned by her parents aged eleven (they lacked the inner courage necessary to come to terms with her “moral turpitude”), she had no option other than to seek refuge in a shelter for eleven-year-old middle class children (of which there were many in those days). It was here, while struggling with her Sherbet dependency problem, that she was introduced to the healing powers of the grapefruit. Legend has it the grapefruit was used by the goddess Shiva, daughter of Steve the Cobbler, to heal warriors plagued by “cripple jaw” during the Manchurian War. Coupled with fresh cream, it’s healing powers were magnified tenfold. It is said any army who carries the “grapefruit and cream” before it is invincible. And so, she took to buying these two commodities every day. Her Sherbet addiction swiftly concluded, from that point forth she vowed to never live another day without eating both in unison.
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It’s almost supernatural the way you sussed out that poor womens background.
I believe she was a conteststant on Big Brother only last week the English translation of her name is Jade, spooky or what??
Sadly her Sherbet addiction appears to have reared its ugly head again, perhaps the grapefruits are weakened by the greenhouse gases and she needs to increase her consumption…
I feel that the hidden tragedy here is the fate of the labradors,
or were they rescued by Moral Turpitude and her partner Steve the Cobbler(a man renowned for the solefulness of his nature)
MumsXX
I wonder what you would have thought of me as i bought, (in the Heywado,next to the barber shop, Ishiyama, Shiga Prefecture), the ingredients for “panakalty”.
Potatoes, corned beef, sausages, bacon, onions, and as they say in Japan …..consomme. Couldn’t find stock cubes!
Additionally 5 loaves of bread for dipping, no fishes of course.
Panakalty is a well known northern dish, which incidentally went down well in “Setaryo “, so well in fact ,that it is now an integral part of southern Japanese cuisine, as important as tofu, gohan etc.
In fact if you ask a Japanese factory worker what he would prefer for dinner you would probably hear “panarkarty ofcorsu ……mmmmmm… onagaishimasu…… ne?”,